A Brighton Boy Blogs

Consumer issues, recipes and apolitical thoughts from a Brighton native.

A Bit of Fun, Social/Political Comment

Chat Bots, Artificial Intelligence and Techno-Geeks

Oh I just love technology. It’s all soooooo sweet the way it desperately tries to please us, like an overenthusiastic puppy that covers you in canine saliva and humps your leg energetically. Actually of course it’s the techno-geeks who create the technology who are projecting their desire to please onto their mechanoid creations. Unfortunately it all gets perverted by the marketing people.

Take the new trend in ChatBots, for example. Yes, as the name might suggest, it’s a software robot that sits chatting on MSN Messenger (or Live Messenger as it has become). Of course what it can chat about is strictly limited by its programming. However, you should at least have some hope that it knows something about its chosen subject. To extend the example, here’s a conversation I had with the robot entitled “My Fashionable Life” which claims to have “Answers for all of your fashion and beauty questions”.

Jon says:
hello
My Fashionable Life says:
Hello Jon! Welcome to My Fashionable Life, brought to you by CLEAN & CLEAR®.

To check out the info I have on the newest CLEAN & CLEAR® skincare line, just type “CLEAN & CLEAR.”
Jon says:
what is empire line?
My Fashionable Life says:
That’s a bit beyond my expertise. Please try asking me another way, or type “?” to see examples of questions I can answer.

Jon says:
what is a pencil skirt?
My Fashionable Life says:
Hi again, Jon. Check out the info I have on the newest CLEAN & CLEAR® skincare line! Just type “CLEAN & CLEAR.”

Type “home” to see everything I can do or just ask me a question!

Sorry, I know about skirts, but I don’t understand your question. Can you try rephrasing it? Or, to see all of my fashion info type “fashion tips.”

I have a ton of new makeup demos. Type “demos.” and check them out!

Jon says:
what is this season’s colour?
My Fashionable Life says:
That’s a bit beyond my expertise. Please try asking me another way, or type “?” to see examples of questions I can answer.

Jon says:
which fashion house does karl lagerfeld work for?
My Fashionable Life says:
You’ve totally confused me! Please try asking me another way, or type “?” to see examples of questions I can answer.

Oh dear. All my fashion & beauty questions? No, it’s just a gimmick conceived by marketing people to sell more “CLEAN & CLEAR® skincare” products. Will it work? I very much doubt it. But undoubtedly there is a small, dark office somewhere, where, slaving away over a hot keyboard in a little alcove, there’s a techno-geek who’s very proud of his creation, and imagining how much pleasure and life-improving goodness he’s bringing to millions. Ahhhh. Bless.

To enjoy the same magical experience, add “[email protected]” to your MSN or Live Messenger.

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